Tag Archives: blogger

Overflowing – an art journal entry

i feel all the creativity in me •

not in a painting drawing illustrating kind of way •

but a journaling collaging words and pictures kind of way •

i watch the movies read the poems see the people •

the words spring to my tongue •

like a dam bursting   overflowing

 

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Karissa ♥

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Change

 

the leaves outside my window fade

green leaches from the veins

replaced by red orange yellow

structure suffers decays

colder and colder still

downpour rinses stems and leaves

green stalks now ripe with age

prepare for incoming frost

leaves shake goodbye to tree and trunk

wind comes

lifeless limp leaves rain upon damp earth

now covered by dead foliage

red and green leaves

Karissa ♥

The apartment I need to have 

I wrote this all in one go. As the thoughts formed in my brain, I wrote them down. I want to share this private conversation I had in my mind with you.


I really want to have the apartment downtown, close to school, but I can’t afford it. I try to be honest with myself, but my wants and desires are stronger than my will for control.

I want to move out and be on my own like the many people who say they moved out early and made it work. I want to go through the struggle of not having much, but having the freedom of living alone. I’m not much for responsibility, but I want the responsibility of having a small home away from home. A way for me to test out living on my own. My grandma stayed at home, my mom stayed at home, I don’t want to stay at home. I want to break free from the generational hold and find new ground to explore. To set new standards.

I want the apartment close to school so I can be at peace knowing I don’t have an hour to 1.5 hrs commute to get back home. I want to not worry about how I’m going to get home when I need to stay at school to study or work or practice or just participate. All my life I’ve lived far from my educational institutions. I’ve never participated as much as I wanted or could have. Never lived up to my full potential in that aspect. I’m 21 years old, years young. I want to release myself from the shackles of the constant commute so that I am able to focus on excelling and not how I’ll make it home that night or day or morning.

I need the apartment for my own well-being. But I can’t afford that apartment. I can’t afford school, but I still apply because I need it for my future. I need this apartment so I have to figure out how to get it.

Karissa ♥

Vivid Warm Dreaming at Work

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the gel never really holds

they snicker and jive at the attempt

sprouting like weeds, thinly, sparse

I nourish, I smooth, I love

a little hold, hope

all still sprout

 

 

 

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Folds fold outward always growing

golden flecks reflect mess

hidden under shadow

lash longing laying flat

brows swooped bare

 

 

 

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bridge broad brown

she never liked

the spread, unevenness covered

reminds me of the father

an extension of the father

exactly like my father

 

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these strands I have 9.5 months in

course dry coil

knobs treasured

simple, remove flash basic

 

 

 

 

 

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chapped smack

full, filled, yet unfulfilled

two toned rosy brown

pout

 

 

 

Butter London – Sunbaker

To find a polish that dries

before I finish all 10 fingers

is to find happiness

 

Karissa ♥

 

 

 

 

 

A Note on the Seasonal Nature of Life

We all have different ‘seasons’ or periods in our lives where we can’t understand the purpose of our current circumstances within the grand scheme of things. Sometimes we can only see the purpose or potential after the chapter has ended and the seasons have changed. Sometimes the purpose never becomes evident until we have accomplished some feat which grew out of the time of uncertainty.

As we age towards the end, we are increasingly faced with choices and responsibility for our lives and those around us, whether directly or indirectly. Choosing to purchase a doughnut will affect others who are also waiting in line, the cashier who will have to ring up your order, the store manager who will have to process your sale on the daily report, the factory or distributor who sells the starting products to the store and so many more. We are indeed all connected. Our actions are like force; when force is applied, an  opposite force pushes back. Life is not rigid, so the opposite push back force may be greater than your original force. The push back could either be in your favor or not depending on the action.

Our happiness and satisfaction in life is influenced 90% by our reactions and attitudes  and 10% by the actual events. Yes, there will be awful and disheartening events and actions taken against you, but how we choose to deal with them determines how stressful or stress-free our lives can be. It can be extremely difficult to see the silver lining or the good in a storm, but it is always there if you have the courage and patience to find it.

Be patient, be brave, be happy!

Karissa ♥

cling to what is gooduncomfortable situationsGod has a purposehis will, my faith